Tuesday, July 27, 2010

C-A-T

Rudy logged into her email account with great anticipation.  Maybe today would be the day that she found her soulmate.  Normally, days could go by without an email.  Her only regular correspondent at this point was Tatum, the yarn lady’s cat, and he was the strong, silent type of cat.  When he had something to say, it was worth listening to, but he wasn’t the type to blather on about things. 

Today was very different.  The messages continued on for several pages, and they all seemed to be in response to her personal ad.  With great anticipation she scanned the message subjects, trying to decide if she should start at the top, bottom or with a particularly promising response.  Hmm, better start with the first response and work her way forward. 

The first one read, “Hi Molly, although my name isn’t Tom I’d like to meet you.  I love babes with long hair, and look forward to brushing yours.  Check out my photo and if you’re interested in getting together call…”  Rudy clicked on the attachment and up popped a photo of a guy next to a motorcycle.  She scrutinized the photo, looking for the cat in the picture.  Even enlarging it, she couldn’t see a cat.  She read the email again carefully and came to the conclusion that the writer was a human, and thought she was one also.  One didn’t typically refer to cats as ‘babes’.  Okay, that one to the trash, on to the next.

After reading about half of the responses, Rudy looked back at her original posting to try to figure out if the humans who had responded were dense or if she had misrepresented herself.  “Long-haired tuxedo molly looking for a tom in central NJ.  I love lying in the sun, being brushed and snuggling up with someone I love.”  It was perfectly clear.  A molly is a female cat, and tuxedo described her black and white coloring.  A tom is a male cat.  She didn’t capitalize either word, so they were clearly not names. 

Rudy quickly scanned through the rest, and not one of them was from a cat.  Most of the photos showed perfectly nice people, and if she was human maybe she might have liked to meet them.  Sighing, Rudy deleted them all and sat thinking.  “Maybe I need to revise my ad and spell out that I’m a cat.  C-A-T.  Cat.  Not a human.” 

She logged on to her Craigslist account and clicked on the button to edit her post.  She futzed with it for a few minutes, and came up with what she thought was a much clearer ad.  “Neutered female cat, long-haired with tuxedo coloring looking for a male cat for companionship and meaningful conversation.  I love lying in the sun, being brushed and snuggling up with someone I love.”   She posted the revised ad and hoped for the best.

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