Saturday, August 21, 2010

A full agenda for the Cat Club

For all that LT had insisted that the Cat Club was just a bunch of cats that liked hanging around together they’d had a lot to discuss in the last few weeks and LT had resorted to a mental agenda to organize his thoughts.  Tonight they had quite a bit to discuss.  The status of the bee population, Inariko the fox, solicitation of advice for Greymalkin regarding the baby in her house and a series of complaints the other cats had about Fuzzy.  LT sighed and started the meeting.  

“We’ve got quite a bit to discuss tonight, so let’s get it over with so that we can have some fun.  Oh, and as an incentive for everyone to be brief, I figured out how to open the treat bag, so we have those incredible crunchy delicacies for after the meeting.”  LT hoped that would help the side conversations that got them off track.

“First item, bees.  I found one small nest of wasps this week and was able to alert my human to its location.  He took care of it early one morning when it was cool, so in my estimation we’re as safe from bees here as we’re going to get.  Has anyone else found any evidence of nests or excessive bee population?”  

Fuzzy didn’t get this emphasis on bees and said so.  “It’s just your human.  What’s the reason the rest of us have to do this bee patrol?”

LT gave Fuzzy a sorrowful look.  “My Mommy has a very bad allergy to bees.  If she got stung and didn’t have her shot thing with her and no one was around she could die.  Isn’t that important enough?”  Fuzzy mumbled an apology and the rest of the cats gave negative reports on the bee population.

Similarly there was little to report on the fox.  A few people had seen her, but she hadn’t talked to anyone or done anything unusual.  Greymalkin told the others of the baby in her house and asked if any of the cats had experience with babies, since she didn’t quite know what to do with the thing.

Fuzzy said that there were babies that visited his house, and if he got the opportunity, he’d scratch them.  LT looked sternly at Fuzzy and told him that Greymalkin didn’t want to get kicked out of her house, and that he should hold his tongue if he didn’t have anything positive to say.  

Bunny said that her owner had grandchildren who came to visit.  “We treat them like kittens.  Until they are old enough to feed themselves, and I’m not talking about using a spoon to get food in their mouths, we don’t scratch or bite.  We wouldn’t do that with each others’ kittens.  We’d go somewhere that the kittens couldn’t hurt us and let their mothers take care of it.  Once they’re old enough to do things like get a drink from the fridge or cookies from the cabinets we figure they’re old enough to take realize that they shouldn’t pull our tails or pick us up roughly.  THEN we scratch them.  They don’t usually require too many of those lessons, unless they’re just mean kids.  Luckily, our human’s grandkids aren’t mean.  They learned very quickly.  Without fur, our scratches hurt.  

Finally, LT had to bring up the one topic he’d been dreading.  “Fuzzy, many of the cats here have come to me with complaints about your behavior.  Although you’ve respected the sanctuary rule we set up for meetings, you’ve verbally tormented many of the cats here and they don’t like it.”

Fuzzy looked menacingly around the group.  “So what?  I don’t see any of the cats here acting like my best friend.  You all have your little cliques, and I’m not included in any of them.  Why should I treat you all better than you do me?”

Peep said hesitantly, “Fuzzy, you’re my brother, and I do love you, but we don’t treat you anywhere near as badly as you treat us.  You used to chase me every chance you got, and still do sometimes.  You’re rude to all of us, and we are perfectly civil to you.  Why would anyone want to invite you to do anything if all you do is insult everyone?”

Fuzzy scowled at everyone, but didn’t say anything.  LT got to the point.  “If you don’t start being at least civil to the other cats sitting here, we’re going to have to, um, terminate your membership in the Cat Club.”  

With that pronouncement Fuzzy did speak up.  “I get it.  Now that there are plenty of other cats here to be in your precious Cat Club, you don’t need me anymore.  I can tell when I’m not wanted.  Good-bye!”  He stalked off into the trees.  

Peep stated the obvious.  “That didn’t go well, LT.”  She sighed.  “Maybe he’ll think about it and decide that it would be better to have friends than victims.  I hope so.  He is my brother, after all.”  She sighed.

LT closed the meeting, and for once none of the cats felt like chatting, and so everyone left for their respective homes.


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