Friday, May 20, 2011

Tatum's Tasty Organic Cat Treats

Tatum was very disappointed.  A little over a month ago Peep and Rudy's Mommy had written a business plan for a business called "Tatum's Tasty Organic Cat Treats".  It was about a business his momey, the yarn lady was starting.  There were going to be all sorts of cat treats that she'd make and sell.  His personal favorite had been Tatum's Tasty Tilapia Treats.  Well, it had been probably two months since he'd first heard of about it, and still nothing had happened.  He'd written to Peep's Mommy a few weeks ago and asked when he was going to be famous (since that's what she'd told him when she asked if they could use his name in the business) and she'd said that he'd always be famous in her heart.  Well, that was nice, in a smarmy sort of way, but what about real fame - and better yet, real profits.  Or at least some of those tilapia treats.  He'd asked his beloved Daddy and the noisy girl for them, but they didn't seem to have a clue what he was talking about. 

So this morning Tatum got on the internet to try to find the business, but couldn't find the website.  He found Tatum's Family Reviews for some organic snacks for people (not cats), recipes for organic cat treats (none of which were made with tilapia) and something about a dog named Tatum who ate Dakota Bison dog food, which happens to contain a lot of salmon (but not tilapia).  He tried Yahoo, Google, Bing, AltaVista and Lycos.  No luck.  Then he tried some of the business search engines -, LexisNexis and ThomasNet.  None of them listed it.  Finally he went to the NJ State Business Gateway Service search, figuring that he could at least get information on the business itself, but it wasn't listed.  The closest he found was Tatum Enterprises in Eugene, Oregon and they installed computer equipment. 

Tatum shook his head.  There must be a mistake.  He had the picture of the cat treats named after him, and it was in a fancy package and everything.  Maybe Rudy would know more about this - he'd send her an email and ask her.  He composed and sent the email and settled down for a nap - it might be a while before she got back to him.

He was awakened by Ursula batting at him through the curtain.  He'd dozed off in the front window where he'd made a protected nest in the curtain on top of the oversized chair.  "Tatum - you've got an email from Rudy.  How come she never writes to me?" 

"Because you don't have an email account, silly.  Remember, you decided that you'd let me do the brain work since you're such a brainless little cat?"  Tatum was not at his best when he'd been rudely woken.  He stretched and ventured out to read the email. 

From: (address withheld)
Re: You've been had!

Dear Dunderhead - I can't believe you fell for that story!  There was never a cat treat company.  There's never going to be a cat treat company, especially one named after you.  It was all for a paper that Mommy had to write for school.  She had to do some sort of project plan about how she'd help a company expand their business and the yarn lady and Mommy came up with an idea for a cat treat company.  Those pictures?  I watched the yarn lady photoshop them.  They're not real.  You are such a sucker. 



Tatum was crushed.  How could his momey have lied to him?  He flopped down on the floor in abject misery.  No cat treats.  No profits.  No international fame.  Ursula came over and sat next to him.  Tentatively she started to groom his ears and when he didn't swat at her she worked her way down his back.  "You know, our momey never said anything about this company at all.  It was all Peep and Rudy's Mommy.  Ours didn't lie to us.  She'd never do that.  She loves us.  And who knows, maybe she does want to start a cat treat business.  When she moves to her new home I bet she starts trying out cat treat recipes instead of just baking those darn cookies every week. 

Tatum considered this.  Maybe Ursula was right.  Maybe Momey would make them some cat treats when she moved into her new home next week.  That might make up at least a little for this terrible disappointment.

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