Tuesday, December 6, 2016

A Letter to President-Elect Trump

Princess Clementine
84E Parkway Drive
Freehold, NJ 07728

December 6, 2016

President-Elect Donald Trump
725 5th Avenue
New York, NY 10022

Dear President-Elect Trump,

I’d like to take this opportunity to introduce myself.  I am Clementine, the Princess of Quite A Lot.  I am a cat, and strongly believe that the Oval Office needs a domestic feline to help with your presidency.  The health benefits of interaction with cats are well known, both physically and mentally.  Petting a cat can lower blood pressure, and the mere presence of a cat can often diffuse a tense situation simply by the utterance of  “oh, look at what the cat is doing”.   While dogs can provide some of the same health benefits, their constant need for attention might prove too distracting in many situations I am sure you will encounter as president.

I do not know if you have a family cat that you intend to bring to Washington with you, but if you do not, I strongly encourage you to visit the local animal shelter to find yourself a good companion cat.  You probably shouldn’t consider a kitten, as the First Cat will need to have a certain amount of personal restraint.  A mature cat, at least two or three years old should be sufficient.  Shelter staff should be able to assist you with finding the right fit – a cat who is neither needy or standoffish. 
Should you require any advice, I am available to provide any wisdom I may have in this area.  I wish you the best of luck with your presidency.  

Warm regards,