Friday, August 20, 2010


The three cats sat around the giant crunchy food bowl discussing how badly their humans understood their communication.  The cats were sure they were perfectly clear, but time after time the Mommy and Daddy misunderstood them.  Even when they addressed a specific question or comment to the cats they didn’t understand what the cats were communicating when they responded. 

Rudy cited an example from just last night.  “Daddy was typing an email and I sat on the keyboard so he’d include a message from me, and instead he thought I wanted my head scratched.  Far from it!  It was hot and sticky and the last thing I wanted was hot fingers in my fur.  I had an important message, although I don’t recall it now.  I even tried typing a word or two and telling him what I was typing at the same time, and he just didn’t get it.”

“Well, I’m sure the Daddy doesn’t know you can really read, much less type, so that’s probably why he gave you a scratch.  I think it’s kind of funny how Daddy misunderstands me, although some day it could cause problems.  At night when there are intruders on the property I hope up onto the new air conditioner in the bedroom.  I tap on the window and meow so the Daddy will come out and investigate.  He comes out all right, but he just picks me up and carries me in and feeds me treats.  Since he comes out, he scares away most of the intruders, and anyhow they’re usually only groundhogs or raccoons.  If it was a burglar or something I’d have to run around the yard and hope he’d chase me.  I love Daddy, but he sure can be dense.  I don’t mind the extra treats, though.”

Peep thought it was entirely unfair that LT got extra treats that way, but since he was the senior cat of the house she held her tongue.  Peep thought about all the times she’d tried to help the Mommy with her math homework.  She always praised Peep for her intelligence and support but never seemed to adopt any of the proofs Peep had tried to explain to her.  Then again, that may have had more to do with her style of developing proofs.  They usually involved mice (or parts of them) and various quantities of crunchy food.  The mice were the variables, of course, since one can never depend on catching a mouse at a specific moment in time.  Crunchy food, on the other hand, was always there.

“You know,” said Peep, “even if Mommy and Daddy don’t understand everything we say, they do understand the really important things.”

Rudy look at Peep and said snidely, “What?  That we wuv them wery, wery much?”

“No Rudy, they understand when we ask them for treats!”  With that, Peep ran to Daddy and nuzzled and capered and sang until he gave her one.  “See?”

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